


Ineffable - Chapter 1

by SoldiersWar



Series: Ineffable [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Angst, Bucky Barnes Fluff, F/M, bucky barnes smut, winter soldier fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-06
Updated: 2018-06-06
Packaged: 2019-05-18 21:18:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14860479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoldiersWar/pseuds/SoldiersWar
Summary: Scarlette has lived most of her teenage years, and young adult life as a Hydra agent. After finally getting out following many traumatic events, she is now in hiding from the scary organization while also trying to heal, and cope with the trauma and guilt being with Hydra has inflicted upon her. She is completely alone, and doesn’t know, or even talk to anyone… Until she runs into a familiar man on her rooftop.





	Ineffable - Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my fic. It is something that is really special to me and has been in works for quite a while now.  
> Word Count: 1208  
> Warnings: Angst, Swearing, Mentions of PTSD.  
> Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Original Character

“Scarlette,” Alexander Pierce mumbled under his breath, rubbing his temples as if my sudden defiance was giving him a headache.   
“Why are you acting this way? It’s nothing you haven’t done a million times before.”   
I felt tears stinging my eyes, but made sure that it didn’t show even a little bit. I had been trained not to show weakness in any situation, and this was one of those moments where I especially needed that.   
“Look, I’m just saying…” I sighed trying to sound apathetic.   
“Is it really that necessary? Can’t you find some other way to shut the guy up instead of getting me to put a bullet in his brain?”   
He stared at me dumbfounded. I had never protested like that before. He had no idea what had come over me. I was always the compliant little assassin doll that he could count on. His little rock star as he would call me when showing me off to other HYDRA officials.  
“Listen!” He snapped. A vein starting to form at the top of his thinning hairline as a result of pure frustration. If I hadn’t been on the other side of his desk sitting down, he probably would have slapped me across the face hard enough to form a nice little bruise.  
“This is not your call. Either you do it, or there will be consequences.”  
I wanted to scream at him. I wanted nothing more than to let out the anger. To make him suffer consequences for all of the hurt he had inflicted upon me and countless others because ‘Hydra was the main priority’. I didn’t want to hear any more bullshit about how it was all for a ‘bigger cause,’ and ‘we all have to make sacrifices’. And that it was to ‘save humanity’. But I wasn’t so sure about what I believed anymore in regards to their master plan.   
I quickly moved up from my chair giving him a challenging stare before swinging my body around swiftly towards the door.   
“Who else are you gonna kill?” I murmured just loud enough for him to hear from the other side of the room.   
“What did you just say?”   
I knew that he knew that I wasn’t just talking about this assignment.   
“I’m going to training.” I said, continuing to walk out the door slamming it shut.   
…  
I woke up suddenly on the couch feeling somewhat panicked, but mostly relieved. I’d often have to remind myself of that it was all over now. That they were all dreams now, no matter how horrible or real they felt.   
But it never made the times I woke up feeling completely paralyzed from anxiety any better. It never made the memories go away. Or bring back the people I had lost, or left behind. It never really made up for the fact that I was now completely alone and unsure about what the near, or distant future would bring. It never made up for the crippling fear that Hydra could find me. I may have escaped from them, but I constantly wondered if I would ever truly be free.  
My body still felt incredibly heavy against the soft cushions of the couch. But I willed myself to slowly get up and turn off the TV that had been nothing but background noise for hours. I looked over at the time and noticed that it was 1 am. I groaned, knowing that there was no way I was getting back to sleep through the night. But it didn’t matter, I never had anywhere to be but my apartment.   
I walked over to the bathroom to at least splash some cold water on my face. At least it might help me clear my head a little bit.   
I looked in the mirror realizing what that I didn’t look so great. I looked as pale as a 3 hours old dead body. My long, black hair was a mess covering my shoulders. And my pupils were so incredibly wide that my green irises almost disappeared.   
I sighed to myself, knowing that I might just need some fresh air. Sitting up high on the roof of my building often made me feel very comfortable. It helped me think, and it honestly helped me feel safe. Nobody else really showed up there, so it was kind of like my own little world outside of the walls of my apartment. Although I couldn’t complain about my apartment at all, it was a very nice place.   
I never stepped out of my place without a gun hidden in the back of my pants. As usual, I didn’t break my rule. Sure, it sometimes felt weird to have a cold metal object constantly poking at my back even if I was grabbing Chinese Food, or shopping for new clothes. But I always knew that I was relatively safe, and had an advantage against anyone who would try to hurt me. Even though I knew very well how kill someone with a paperclip.   
Fortunately, since I had gotten the hell out of Washington as soon as I could, I knew I was a little bit out of the way from where Hydra knew where to look for me. I had confidence that it would take a lot of work for them to find me. I guess that’s what happens when HYDRA make good little spies. They actually learn how to stay away from them.    
I sat at the edge of the building, finally finding a moment peace. I could hear distant sirens fading in and out, cars moving fast and slow. A slow hum from the wind creating a small whistle as it traveled through buildings, fields, bridges, and rivers. It was truly mesmerizing. It was moments like these where my mind was truly at bay. I knew that things could be okay for at least one or two moments.   
I suddenly heard a slight shuffle behind me. Like something was coming out behind one of the giant boards that stayed on the roof. I instinctively kept my hand close to the gun hidden in the back of my pants knowing that it could probably just be a raccoon. Whatever it was, it was good at being incredibly quiet. I quietly moved out of my spot and over to the area just for peace of mind. I heard a shuffle again, and a large shadow behind one of the blue tarps hanging over the wooden boards. This was definitely a person. And someone who was hiding from me. I kept my hand against my gun, cautiously moving over to where this person was.   
Suddenly, a man appeared right before my eyes. He was big, tall, and muscular. He had a thin black hoodie on, with his left hand in his pocket emitting a silver shine coming from his slightly exposed wrist. He looked at me, his brow furrowing in confusion, his eyes moving back and forth as if he wasn’t sure what to do in that moment. Maybe it was that I looked as scared as I felt, knowing my world falling completely apart. That I knew what him being here meant. But there was no way that things were going to go his way.


End file.
